Did I forget to smile when I spoke to my friends?
It can be easy for me to forget I’m visiting to have a great time, my
Distress would ruin things here and I wouldn’t want to lower the mood.
Yesterday I folded my clothes so neatly but,
Only I can’t bring myself to even wash up or hoover today.
Unprepared feelings creep over me making my muscles heavy and my mind ache.
Many times, I reach out on social media for guidance;
Instagram stories that last 24 hours and quickly deleted tweets, but
Somethings different this time. This time I’m quiet, I’m not
Sure my absence has been noticed – just easier to leave me to it.
Time is meant to heal all wounds, and perhaps it
Has to an extent, until a new wound opens but they want to see me have a happy
Ending, so I push through lying that now is my time in life, that I’m happy.
Sometimes life seems to settle, and I think
It’s all going to be okay, just maybe life is
Going my way. Until life throws another curveball at me, forcing me to
Narrow my vision on my own self-worth, contemplating if it’s time to just finally give up.
So, with such subtleties, no one can blame you for missing the signs, right
Becca Louise Savory